I get asked a lot, “What will my first session look like?” It’s actually a tough question to answer because every session is highly individual. It may sound a little corny, but it’s true. Just think about the variations in vanilla sexual styles, then multiply that by all the possible dynamics within BDSM. That’s why being a professional domme requires a great deal of intuition.

Before our session, please always remind me of your physical and emotional limits so they are clearly established by the time we begin.

Typically, I bring you into the dungeon and you put on your latex suit. I usually place a collar on my clients as a symbol of their submission (though not always—for example, in domestic-style discipline this may be out of place).

If corporal punishment is involved (which it often is), I warm you up with light-to-medium whipping or spanking. There is usually some bondage involved to help you take the discipline. I whip or spank you rhythmically, gradually building the intensity.

I also use a lot of verbal dominance—role play, verbal humiliation, and similar dynamics—to create the atmosphere of my dominance over you.

A good scene has an arc, like a story or a piece of music. There’s a beginning, a peak, and an end. The specific timing may vary, but there is always a clear flow. While I’m part of that flow, I’m also managing it—watching closely and timing things so that you have a complete and rounded experience within the session timeframe.

As the session comes to an end, I gradually bring down the intensity. I usually provide a few minutes of aftercare, depending on how intense the scene was.

Often I’ll give you a hug or sit on your face. I like my clients, and I like them to feel that.